Wednesday, April 25, 2012

Cheshbon counting the omer through day 49

R. Noah Weinberg's Essay group title


Make the Omer Count
Instead of counting down toward the big day, with the Omer we count up -- from one to 50. Why?

by Rabbi Shraga Simmons
http://www.aish.com/h/o/t/48970201.html

The Jewish people left Egypt on Passover, and 50 days later (on the holiday of Shavuot) received the Torah at Mount Sinai. Today, in revisiting that Sinai experience, we observe a special mitzvah called "Counting the Omer," where we actually count aloud each of these days, beginning on the second night of Passover. (The Omer was a special offering brought to the Holy Temple during this season.)

Counting in anticipation of an exciting event is quite understandable. At one time or another, we've all probably said something like, "Grandma's coming to visit in a week and a half," or "Only 17 more days til my birthday!" But there's one subtle difference: The usual method is to count down toward the big day, whereas in the case of the Omer, we count up ― from one to 50. Why the difference?

LONG-TERM IMPACT

To understand, we first need to answer a more basic question: Why did God wait 50 days after the Jews left Egypt before giving the Torah? Why didn't He simply give it to them in Egypt, or immediately after their departure?

The answer is that the Jews were not yet spiritually equipped to receive the Torah. For over 200 years, they had been living in an Egyptian society known to be the world center for immorality and vice. Even without direct Jewish participation, these influences nonetheless permeated the air and seeped into their consciousness. The primary book of Kabbalah, "The Zohar," reports that in Egypt the Jews had slipped to the 49th level of spiritual impurity. (50 is the very lowest.) God could not give the Torah at this point. The Jews needed to grow up first, or else they would have squandered the opportunity.

The high-impact adventure of the Exodus ― 10 miraculous plagues and the splitting of the Red Sea ― launched the Jews into physical freedom. Yet the miracles of Egypt were only a jump-start to the spiritual possibilities that lay ahead. A one-time experience, as powerful as it is, does not permanently change anyone's emotional attitude. That is only possible through practice and adjustment over time.

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It reminds me of a scene from the film "Trading Places." Eddie Murphy has gone from beggar to wealth in a few hours, and the first thing he does upon entering his own luxury apartment is to steal things! His physical body had been transported to opulence, but emotionally he was left behind. You can take the Jew out of Egypt, but you can't take Egypt out of the Jew.

I've witnessed a similar phenomenon at the Discovery Seminar, a dramatic presentation of the rational basis for Jewish belief. Many people leave the seminar with the astounding conviction that God exists and that He gave the Torah to the Jewish people at Mount Sinai. Yet without proper follow-up, the impact lasts but a few days. Real change occurs only through steady day-to-day growth and a commitment to a consistent program of contemplation and study.

Now we can understand why the 50 days of the Omer is counted in a forward progression. We begin the process at the 49th level of spiritual impurity, and every day we peel away another layer of gunk, to reveal the original, pure soul we each possess. That's why every step both reduces the negative number and increases the positive number ― the single step of peeling away a layer automatically reveals the corresponding positive side.

A TIME OF GROWTH

Classic Talmudic commentators say that the days of counting the Omer are the most auspicious for acquiring these spiritual levels.

This necessity for self-growth is stressed in the Torah's description of Abraham: "Abraham was old, he came with his days" (Genesis 24:1). "He came with his days" teaches us that Abraham used each of his days to the fullest extent. At the end of his life, he came to old age "with all his days" in hand. No day was without its requisite growth.

When it comes to children, we take for granted that growth and development is part of childhood. You don't expect a 10-year-old to act the same way he did at age five. But somehow as adults, we lose that impulse to continue growing. Yet should a 30-year-old act as he did at age 25? As adults, we could be using those five years in a very powerful way.

The formula for staying young is to continue growing. Losing that capacity at any age is tragic. Any time we're not growing and changing, we're not living. We're just existing.

ONE STEP AT A TIME

A major impediment to growth is the feeling of being overwhelmed by the magnitude of the task. But Judaism is not all-or-nothing. If I cannot have 1,000 gold coins, does that mean I should not strive to have even one?! The biggest reason people fail is that they have set a goal which is too lofty and unattainable. We inevitably fall short and get discouraged.

In Jacob's famous dream, God shows him a vision of a ladder reaching toward heaven. Spiritual growth, like climbing a ladder, must be one step at a time. By setting small, incremental goals, we will be encouraged by the periodic success. To make the plan foolproof, make your initial goal something you know you can reach. Tasting success will bolster your confidence and determination, and you can use this energy to strive for higher goals. Remember, the longest journey begins with just one step. And what goes in slow, will remain.

The story is told of Rabbi Yisrael Salanter (19th century Europe) who took upon himself to lead an entire city back to Torah observance. He set up a weekly class and began by telling them, "If you have to work on Shabbat, at least try to minimize the violation." In today's lexicon, that would mean walking instead of driving, or setting your TV on a timer. With this approach, Rabbi Salanter was able over a few years to turn the community around to full Shabbat observance ― one step at a time.

Take pleasure in the times you achieved your goal, and use that as a motivation to improve further. Don't castigate yourself if you do not always succeed. No human being is perfect. The Kabbalists say that spiritual growth is "two steps forward and one step back." We will inevitably have setbacks. What's important is that we're heading in the right direction.

King Solomon tells us in Proverbs (24:16): "The Tzaddik falls seven times and gets up." The definition of a Tzaddik is not someone who never makes a mistake, but rather someone who, although he may fail, does not give up. He tries again and does not despair!

SPIRITUAL ACCOUNTING

One important principle to remember is that you are not competing with anyone but yourself. Secular society has accustomed us to compete against others ― whether in business or on the tennis court. Of course, healthy competition is good. But life is not a race to beat the other guy; life is only a race to conquer yourself. As we climb the ladder, it's more important which direction we're headed than which rung we're on.

Nowhere in the entire Torah is the date of Shavuot mentioned. It merely takes place at the end of 50 days ― because the key is to get there at your own pace, following these steps. To maintain growth, a good rule of thumb is to always be a bit uncomfortable. You don't want to climb a ladder and get stuck between rungs!

It also helps to reinforce your goals by writing them down. Writing helps a person to concentrate and clarify his thoughts. A business person would surely write out goals and keep an accurate tally of their progress. In Judaism, this is called Cheshbon ― a spiritual accounting.

Keep a notebook for writing down these daily goals, and make a chart to track your progress. Place this in a conspicuous place like in your daytimer or on the refrigerator, and then review your goals by reading them aloud. The Torah, in describing the Omer, says, "count for you" (Leviticus 23:15) ― because each person has to do this for himself, speaking it aloud. Strategize!

As with anything, the key is consistency. Choose a convenient time and commit to working on this at least 15 minutes every day. Don't postpone learning for "afterwards," at which time it becomes late and you may be too tired. Say to yourself that you are going to dedicate 15 minutes and nothing is going to stop you. Close your door, unplug your phone, and log offline. If you need a daily reminder, try the buddy system.

Ideally, at the end of the Omer process, we will have experienced a journey of self-improvement and be ready to receive the Torah. The holiday we're working toward is called "Shavuot," which means "weeks." The name itself tells us that without the weeks of preparation beforehand, there is no Shavuot. So don't just count the Omer ― make the Omer count
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http://www.aish.com/h/o/t/48969716.html
Daily Omer Meditation
A practical guide to becoming great in 49 days.

by Rabbi Simon Jacobson
With the mitzvah of counting the 49 days, known as Sefirat Ha'Omer, the Torah invites us on a journey into the human psyche, into the soul. There are seven basic emotions that make up the spectrum of human experience. At the root of all forms of enslavement, is a distortion of these emotions. Each of the seven weeks between Passover and Shavuot is dedicated to examining and refining one of them.

The seven emotional attributes are:

1.Chesed - Loving-kindness
2.Gevurah -- Justice and discipline
3.Tiferet - Harmony, compassion
4.Netzach - Endurance
5.Hod - Humility
6.Yesod - Bonding
7.Malchut - Sovereignty, leadership

The seven weeks, which represent these emotional attributes, further divide into seven days making up the 49 days of the counting. Since a fully functional emotion is multidimensional, it includes within itself a blend of all seven attributes. Thus, the counting of the first week, which begins on the second night of Pesach, as well as consisting of the actual counting ("Today is day one of the Omer...") would consist of the following structure with suggested meditations:

Upon conclusion of the 49 days we arrive at the 50th day -- Mattan Torah. After we have achieved all we can accomplish through our own initiative, traversing and refining every emotional corner of our psyche, we then receive a gift ('mattan' in Hebrew) from above. We receive that which we could not achieve with our own limited faculties. We receive the gift of true freedom -- the ability to transcend our human limitations and touch the divine.

Day 1 -- Chesed of Chesed: Loving-kindness in Loving-kindness

Love is the single most powerful and necessary component in life. It is both giving and receiving. Love allows us to reach above and beyond ourselves, to experience another person and to allow that person to experience us. It is the tool by which we learn to experience the highest reality -- God. Examine the love aspect of your love.

Ask yourself: What is my capacity to love another person? Do I have problems with giving? Am I stingy or selfish? Is it difficult for me to let someone else into my life? Am I afraid of my vulnerability, of opening up and getting hurt?

Exercise for the day: Find a new way to express your love to a dear one

Day 2 -- Gevurah of Chesed: Discipline in Loving-kindness

Healthy love must always include an element of discipline and discernment; a degree of distance and respect for another's boundaries; an assessment of another's capacity to contain your love. Love must be tempered and directed properly. Ask a parent who, in the name of love, has spoiled a child; or someone who suffocates a spouse with love and doesn't allow them any personal space.

Exercise for the day: Help someone on their terms not on yours. Apply yourself to their specific needs even if it takes effort.

Day 3 -- Tiferet of Chesed: Compassion, Harmony in Loving-kindness

Harmony in love is one that blends both the chesed and gevurah aspects of love. Harmonized love includes empathy and compassion. Love is often given with the expectation of receiving love in return. Compassionate love is given freely; expects nothing in return - even when the other doesn't deserve love. Tiferet is giving also to those who have hurt you.

Exercise for the day: Offer a helping hand to a stranger

Day 4 -- Netzach of Chesed: Endurance in Loving-kindness

Is my love enduring? Does it withstand challenges and setbacks? Do I give and withhold love according to my moods or is it constant regardless of the ups and downs of life?

Exercise for the day: Reassure a loved one of the constancy of your love


Day 5 -- Hod of Chesed: Humility in Loving-kindness

You can often get locked in love and be unable to forgive your beloved or to bend or compromise your position. Hod introduces the aspect of humility in love; the ability to rise above yourself and forgive or give in to the one you love just for the sake of love even if you're convinced that you're right. Arrogant love is not love.

Exercise for the day: Swallow your pride and reconcile with a loved one with whom you have quarreled.

Day 6 -- Yesod of Chesed: Bonding in Loving-kindness

For love to be eternal it requires bonding. A sense of togetherness which actualizes the love in a joint effort. An intimate connection, kinship and attachment, benefiting both parties. This bonding bears fruit; the fruit born out of a healthy union.

Exercise for the day: Start building something constructive together with a loved one

Day 7 -- Malchut of Chesed: Nobility in Loving-kindness

Mature love comes with -- and brings -- personal dignity. An intimate feeling of nobility and regality. Knowing your special place and contribution in this world. Any love that is debilitating and breaks the human spirit is no love at all. For love to be complete it must have the dimension of personal sovereignty.

Exercise for the day: Highlight an aspect of your love that has bolstered your spirit and enriched your life...and celebrate.

WEEK 2 - GEVURAH: JUSTICE, DISCIPLINE, RESTRAINT, AWE

After the miraculous Exodus from Egypt, the Jewish people spent 49 days preparing for the most awesome experience in human history -- the giving of the Torah at Mount Sinai. Just as the Jewish peoples' redemption from Egypt teaches us how to achieve inner freedom in our lives; so too, this 49-day period, called 'Sefirat Ha-Omer' the Counting of the Omer, is a time of intense character refinement and elevation.

During this time, the aspect of the human psyche that most requires refinement is the area of the emotions. The spectrum of human experience consists of seven emotional attributes, or sefirot. This week we continue Sefirat Ha'Omer, utilizing the seven dimensions of the seven emotional attributes. The first week after Pesach was dedicated to examining the aspect of chesed, loving-kindness. The second week corresponds to the emotional attribute of gevurah, discipline or justice.

If love (Chesed) is the bedrock of human expression, discipline (Gevurah) is the channel through which we express love. It gives our life and love direction and focus. Gevurah -- discipline and measure -- concentrates and directs our efforts, our love in the proper directions.

Day 8 - Chesed of Gevurah: Loving-kindness in Discipline

The underlying intention and motive in discipline is love. Why do we measure our behavior, why do we establish standards and expect people to live up to them -- only because of love. Chesed of gevurah is the love in discipline; it is the recognition that your personal discipline and the discipline you expect of others is only an expression of love. It is the understanding that we have no right to judge others; we have a right only to love them and that includes wanting them to be their best.

Ask yourself: when I judge and criticize another is it in any way tinged with any of my own contempt and irritation? Is there any hidden satisfaction in his failure? Or is it only out of love for the other?

Exercise for the day: Before you criticize someone today, think twice: Is it out of concern and love?

Day 9 -- Gevurah of Gevurah: Discipline in Discipline

Examine the discipline factor of discipline: Is my discipline reasonably restrained or is it excessive? Do I have enough discipline in my life and in my interactions? Am I organized? Is my time used efficiently? Why do I have problems with discipline and what can I do to enhance it? Do I take time each day for personal accounting of my schedule and accomplishments?

Exercise for the day: Make a detailed plan for spending your day and at the end of the day see if you've lived up to it.

Day 10 -- Tiferet of Gevurah: Compassion in Discipline

Underlying and driving discipline must not only be love, but also compassion. Compassion is unconditional love. It is love just for the sake of love, not considering the others position. Tiferet is a result of total selflessness in the eyes of God. You love for no reason; you love because you are a reflection of God. Does my discipline have this element of compassion?

Exercise for the day: Be compassionate to someone you have reproached.

Day 11 -- Netzach of Gevurah: Endurance in Discipline

Effective discipline must be enduring and tenacious. Is my discipline consistent or only when forced? Do I follow through with discipline? Am I perceived as a weak disciplinarian?

Exercise for the day: Extend the plan you made on day two for a longer period of time listing short-term and long-term goals. Review and update it each day, and see how consistent you are and if you follow through.

Day 12 -- Hod of Gevurah: Humility in Discipline

The results of discipline and might without humility are obvious. The greatest catastrophes have occurred as a result of people sitting in arrogant judgment of others. Am I arrogant in the name of justice (what I consider just)? Do I ever think that I sit on a higher pedestal and bestow judgment on my subjects below? What about my children? Students?

Exercise for the day: Before judging anyone, insure that you are doing so selflessly with no personal bias

Day 13 -- Yesod of Gevurah: Bonding in Discipline

For discipline to be effective it must be coupled with commitment and bonding. Both in disciplining yourself and others there has to be a sense that the discipline is important for developing a stronger bond. Not that I discipline you, but that we are doing it together for our mutual benefit.

Exercise for the day: Demonstrate to your child or student how discipline is an expression of intensifying your bond and commitment to each other.

Day 14 -- Malchut of Gevurah: Nobility of Discipline

Discipline, like love, must enhance personal dignity. Discipline that breaks a person will backfire. Healthy discipline should bolster self-esteem and help elicit the best in a person; cultivating his sovereignty. Does my discipline cripple the human spirit; does it weaken or strengthen me and others?

Exercise for the day: When disciplining your child or student, foster his self-respect

* * *

WEEK 3 - TIFERET - HARMONY, COMPASSION

During the third week of Counting the Omer, we examine the emotional attribute of Tiferet or compassion. Tiferet blends and harmonizes the free outpouring love of Chesed with the discipline of Gevurah. Tiferet possesses this power by introducing a third dimension -- the dimension of truth, which is neither love nor discipline and therefore can integrate the two.

Truth is accessed through selflessness: rising above your ego and your predispositions, enabling you to realize truth. Truth gives you a clear and objective picture of yours and others' needs. This quality gives Tiferet its name, which means beauty: it blends the differing colors of love and discipline, and this harmony makes it beautiful.

Day 15 -- Chesed of Tiferet: Loving-kindness in Compassion

Examine the love aspect of compassion. Ask yourself: Is my compassion tender and loving or does it come across as pity? Is my sympathy condescending and patronizing? Even if my intention is otherwise, do others perceive it as such? Does my compassion overflow with love and warmth; is it expressed with enthusiasm, or is it static and lifeless?

Exercise for the day: When helping someone extend yourself in the fullest way; offer a smile or a loving gesture.

Day 16 -- Gevurah of Tiferet: Discipline in Compassion

For compassion to be effective and healthy it needs to be disciplined and focused. It requires discretion both to whom you express compassion, and in the measure of the compassion itself. It is recognizing when compassion should be expressed and when it should be withheld or limited. Discipline in compassion is knowing that being truly compassionate sometimes requires withholding compassion. Because compassion is not an expression of the bestower's needs but a response to the recipient's needs.

Exercise for the day: Express your compassion in a focused and constructive manner by addressing someone's specific needs.

Day 17 -- Tiferet of Tiferet: Compassion in Compassion

True compassion is limitless. It is not an extension of your needs and defined by your limited perspective. Compassion for another is achieved by having a selfless attitude, rising above yourself and placing yourself in the other person's situation and experience. Am I prepared and able to do that? If not, why? Do I express and actualize the compassion and empathy in my heart? What blocks me from expressing it? Is my compassion compassionate or self-serving? Is it compassion that comes out of guilt rather than genuine empathy? How does that affect and distort my compassion? Test yourself by seeing if you express compassion even when you don't feel guilty.

Exercise for the day: Express your compassion in a new way that goes beyond your previous limitations: express it towards someone to whom you have been callous.

Day 18 -- Netzach of Tiferet: Endurance in Compassion

Is my compassion enduring and consistent? Is it reliable or whimsical? Does it prevail among other forces in my life? Do I have the capacity to be compassionate even when I'm busy with other activities or only when it's comfortable for me? Am I ready to stand up and fight for another?

Exercise for the day: In the middle of your busy day take a moment and call someone who needs a compassionate word. Defend someone who is in need of sympathy even if it's not a popular position.

Day 19 -- Hod of Tiferet: Humility in Compassion

If compassion is not to be condescending, it must include humility. Hod is recognizing that my ability to be compassionate and giving does not make me better than the recipient; it is the acknowledgment and appreciation that by creating one who needs compassion God gave me the gift of being able to bestow compassion. Thus there is no place for haughtiness in compassion.

Do I feel superior because I am compassionate? Do I look down at those that need my compassion? Am I humble and thankful to God for giving me the ability to have compassion for others?

Exercise for the day: Express compassion in an anonymous fashion, not taking any personal credit.

Day 20 -- Yesod of Tiferet: Bonding in Compassion

For compassion to be fully realized, it needs bonding. It requires creating a channel between giver and receiver; a mutuality that extends beyond the moment of need. A bond that continues to live on. That is the most gratifying result of true compassion. Do you bond with the one you have compassion for, or do you remain apart? Does your interaction achieve anything beyond a single act of sympathy?

Exercise for the day: Ensure that something eternal is built as a result of your compassion.

Day 21 -- Malchut of Tiferet: Nobility in Compassion

Examine the dignity of your compassion. For compassion to be complete (and enhance the other six aspects of compassion) it must recognize and appreciate individual sovereignty. It should boost self-esteem and cultivate human dignity. Both your own dignity and the dignity of the one benefiting from your compassion.

Is my compassion expressed in a dignified manner? Does it elicit dignity in others? Do I recognize the fact that when I experience compassion as dignified it will reflect reciprocally in the one who receives compassion?

Exercise for the day: Rather than just giving charity, help the needy help themselves in a fashion that strengthens their dignity.

* * *

WEEK 4 - NETZACH - ENDURANCE

During the fourth week of counting the Omer, we examine and refine the emotional attribute of endurance known as Netzach. Netzach means endurance, fortitude and ambition and is a combination of determination and tenacity. It is a balance of patience, persistence and guts. Endurance is also being reliable and accountable, which establishes security and commitment.

Without endurance, any good endeavor or intention has no chance of success. Endurance means to be alive, to be driven by what counts. It is the readiness to fight for what you believe, to go all the way. This, of course, requires that endurance be closely examined to ensure that it is used in a healthy and productive manner.
Day 22 -- Chesed of Netzach: Loving-kindness in Endurance

For anything to endure it needs to be loved. A neutral or indifferent attitude will reflect in a marginal commitment. If you have difficulty making commitments, examine how much you love and enjoy the object that requires your commitment. Do I love my work? My family? My choices? For endurance to be effective it needs to be caring and loving. Does my endurance cause me to be, or seem to be, inflexible? Does my drive and determination cause me to be controlling? Am I too demanding? Do others (my employees, friends, children) cooperate with me out of the sheer force of my will and drive, or out of love?

Exercise for the day: When fighting for something you believe in, pause a moment to ensure that it is accomplished in a loving manner.

Day 23 -- Gevurah of Netzach: Discipline in Endurance

Examine the discipline of your endurance. Endurance must be directed toward productive goals and expressed in a constructive manner. Is my endurance and determination focused to help cultivate good habits and break bad ones? Or is it the other way around? Does my endurance come from strength or weakness? Does it come out of deep conviction or out of defensiveness? Do I use my endurance against itself by being tenacious in my lack of determination?

Exercise for the day: Break one bad habit today.
start day 24
Day 24 -- Tiferet of Netzach: Compassion in Endurance

Healthy endurance, directed to develop good qualities and modifying bad ones, will always be compassionate. The compassion of endurance reflects a most beautiful quality of endurance: an enduring commitment to help another grow. Endurance without compassion is misguided and selfish. Endurance needs to be not just loving to those who deserve love, but also compassionate to the less fortunate. Does my determination compromise my compassion for others? Am I able to rise above my ego and empathize with my competitors? Am I gracious in victory?

Exercise for the day: Be patient and listen to someone who usually makes you impatient.

Day 25- Netzach of Netzach: Endurance in Endurance

Everyone has willpower and determination. We have the capacity to endure much more than we can imagine, and to prevail under the most trying of circumstances.

Ask yourself: Is my behavior erratic? Am I inconsistent and unreliable? Since I have will and determination, why am I so mercurial? Am I afraid of accessing my endurance and committing? Do I fear being trapped by my commitment? If yes, why? Is it a reaction to some past trauma? Instead of cultivating endurance in healthy areas, have I developed a capacity for endurance of unhealthy experiences? Do I endure more pain than pleasure? Do I underestimate my capacity to endure?

Exercise for the day: Commit yourself to developing a new good habit.

Day 26 -- Hod of Netzach: Humility in Endurance

Yielding -- which is a result of humility -- is an essential element of enduring. Standing fast can sometimes be a formula for destruction. The oak, lacking the ability to bend in the hurricane, is uprooted. The reed, which yields to the wind, survives without a problem. Do I know when to yield, out of strength not fear? Why am I often afraid to yield?

Endurance is fueled by inner strength. Hod of Netzach is the humble recognition and acknowledgement that the capacity to endure and prevail comes from the soul that God gave each person. This humility does not compromise the drive of endurance; on the contrary, it intensifies it, because human endurance can go only so far and endure only so much, whereas endurance that comes from the Divine soul is limitless.

Do I attribute my success solely to my own strength and determination? Am I convinced that I am all-powerful due to my level of endurance? Where do I get the strength at times when everything seems so bleak?

Exercise for the day: When you awake, acknowledge God for giving you a soul with the extraordinary power and versatility to endure despite trying challenges. This will allow you to draw energy and strength for the entire day.

Day 27 -- Yesod of Netzach: Bonding in Endurance

Bonding is an essential quality of endurance. It expresses your unwavering commitment to the person or experience you are bonding with, a commitment so powerful that you will endure all to preserve it. Endurance without bonding will not endure.

Exercise for the day: To ensure the endurance of your new resolution, bond with it immediately. This can be assured by promptly actualizing your resolution in some constructive deed or committing yourself to another.

Day 28 -- Malchus of Netzach: Nobility in Endurance

Sovereignty is the cornerstone of endurance. Endurance that encompasses the previous six qualities is indeed a tribute and testimony to the majesty of the human spirit. Is my endurance dignified? Does it bring out the best in me? When faced with hardships do I behave like a king or queen, walking proudly with my head up, confident in my God-given strengths, or do I cower and shrivel up in fear? Exercise for the day: Fight for a dignified cause.
WEEK 5 - HOD - HUMILITY

During the fifth week of counting the Omer, we examine and refine the emotional attribute of Hod or humility. Humility -- and the resulting yielding -- should not be confused with weakness and lack of self-esteem. Hod or humility is modesty -- it is acknowledgment (from the root of the Hebrew word "hoda'ah"). It is saying "thank you" to God. It is clearly recognizing your qualities and strengths and acknowledging that they are not your own; they were given to you by God for a higher purpose than just satisfying your own needs. Humility is modesty; it is recognizing how small you are which allows you to realize how large you can become. And that makes humility so formidable.

A full cup cannot be filled. When you're filled with yourself and your needs, "I and nothing else", there is no room for more. When you "empty" yourself before something greater than yourself, your capacity to receive increases beyond your previously perceived limits. Humility is the key to transcendence; to reach beyond yourself. Only true humility gives you the power of total objectivity. Humility is sensitivity; it is healthy shame out of recognition that you can be better than you are and that you can expect more of yourself. Although humility is silent it is not a void. It is a dynamic expression of life that includes all seven qualities of love, discipline, compassion, endurance, humility, bonding and sovereignty.

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Day 29 -- Chesed of Hod: Loving-kindness in Humility

Examine the love in your humility. Healthy humility is not demoralizing; it brings love and joy not fear. Humility that lacks love has to be reexamined for its authenticity. Sometimes humility can be confused with low self-esteem, which would cause it to be unloving. Humility brings love because it gives you the ability to rise above yourself and love another. Does my humility cause me to be more loving and giving? More expansive? Or does it inhibit and constrain me?

Exercise for the day: Before praying with humility and acknowledgment of God, give some charity. It will enhance your prayers
Day 30 -- Gevurah of Hod: Discipline in Humility

Humility must be disciplined and focused. When should my humility cause me to compromise and when not? In the name of humility do I sometimes remain silent and neutral in the face of wickedness? Humility must also include respect and awe for the person or experience before whom you stand humble. If my humility is wanting, is it because I don't respect another?

Exercise for the day: Focus in on your reluctance to commit in a given area to see if it originates from a healthy, humble place.

Day 31 -- Tiferet of Hod: Compassion in Humility

Examine if your humility is compassionate. Does my humility cause me to be self-contained and anti-social or does it express itself in empathy for others. Is my humility balanced and beautiful? Or is it awkward? Just as humility brings compassion, compassion can lead one to humility. If you lack humility, try acting compassionately, which can help bring you to humility.

Exercise for the day: Express a humble feeling in an act of compassion.
Day 32 -- Netzach of Hod: Endurance in Humility

Examine the strength and endurance of your humility. Does my humility withstand challenges? Am I firm in my positions or do I waffle in the name of humility? Humility and modesty should not cause one to feel weak and insecure. Netzach of Hod underscores the fact that true humility does not make you into a "doormat" for others to step on; on the contrary, humility gives you enduring strength. Is my humility perceived as weakness? Does that cause others to take advantage of me?

Exercise for the day: Demonstrate the strength of your humility by initiating or actively participating in a good cause.
Day 33 -- Hod of Hod: Humility in Humility

Everyone has humility and modesty in their hearts, the question is the measure and manner in which one consciously feels it. Am I afraid to be too humble? Do I mask and protect my modesty with aggressive behavior? Humility must also be examined for its genuineness. Is my humility humble? Or is it yet another expression of arrogance? Do I take too much pride in my humility? Do I flaunt it? Is it self-serving? Is my humility part of a crusade or is it genuine?

Exercise for the day: Be humble just for its own sake.
Day 34 -- Yesod of Hod: Bonding in Humility

Humility should not be a lonely experience. It ought to result in deep bonding and commitment. There is no stronger bond than one that comes out of humility. Does my humility separate me from others or bring us closer? Does my humility produce results? Long term results? Does it create an everlasting foundation upon which I and others can rely and build.

Exercise for the day: Use your humility to build something lasting.

Day 35 -- Malchut of Hod: Nobility in Humility

Walking humbly is walking tall. Dignity is the essence of humility and modesty. The splendor of humility is majestic and aristocratic. Humility that suppresses the human spirit and denies individual sovereignty is not humility at all. Does my humility make me feel dignified? Do I feel alive and vibrant?

Exercise for the day: Teach someone how humility and modesty enhance human dignity.

WEEK 6 - YESOD - BONDING

During the sixth week of counting the Omer, we examine and refine the emotional attribute of Yesod or bonding. Bonding means connecting; not only feeling for another, but being attached to him. Not just a token commitment, but total devotion. It creates a channel between giver and receiver. Bonding is eternal. It develops an everlasting union that lives on forever through the perpetual fruit it bears.

Bonding is the foundation of life. The emotional spine of the human psyche. Every person needs bonding to flourish and grow. The bonding between mother and child; between husband and wife; between brothers and sisters; between close friends. Bonding is affirmation; it gives one the sense of belonging; that "I matter", "I am significant and important". It establishes trust -- trust in yourself and trust in others. It instills confidence. Without bonding and nurturing we cannot realize and be ourselves.



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start5 w 36
____________ Day 37 -- Gevurah of Yesod: Discipline of Bonding Bonding must be done with discretion and careful consideration with whom and with what you bond. Even the healthiest and closest bonding needs "time out", a respect for each individual's space. Do I overbond? Am I too dependent on the one I bond with? Is he too dependent on me? Do I bond out of desperation? Do I bond with healthy, wholesome people? Exercise for the day: Review the discipline in your bonding experiences to see if it needs adjustment.

Day 38 -- Tiferet of Yesod: Compassion in Bonding Bonding needs to be not only loving but also compassionate, feeling your friend's pain and empathizing with him. Is my bonding conditional? Do I withdraw when I am uncomfortable with my friend's troubles? Exercise for the day: Offer help and support in dealing with an ordeal of someone with whom you have bonded.

Day 39 -- Netzach of Yesod: Endurance in Bonding An essential component of bonding is its endurance; its ability to withstand challenges and setbacks. Without endurance there is no chance to develop true bonding. Am I totally committed to the one with whom I bond? How much will I endure and how ready am I to fight to maintain this bond? Is the person I bond with aware of my devotion? Exercise for the day: Demonstrate the endurance level of your bonding by confronting a challenge that obstructs the bond.

Day 40 -- Hod of Yesod: Humility of Bonding Humility is crucial in healthy bonding. Arrogance divides people. Preoccupation with your own desires and needs separates you from others. Humility allows you to appreciate another person and bond with him. Healthy bonding is the union of two distinct people, with independent personalities, who join for a higher purpose than satisfying their own needs. True humility comes from recognizing and acknowledging God in your life. Am I aware of the third partner -- God -- in bonding? And that this partner gives me the capacity to unite with another, despite our distinctions. Exercise for the day: When praying acknowledge God specifically for helping you bond with others.

Day 41 -- Yesod of Yesod: Bonding in Bonding Every person needs and has the capacity to bond with other people, with significant undertakings and with meaningful experiences. Do I have difficulty bonding? Is the difficulty in all areas or only in certain ones? Do I bond easily with my job, but have trouble bonding with people? Or vice versa? Examine the reasons for not bonding. Is it because I am too critical and find fault in everything as an excuse for not bonding? Am I too locked in my own ways? Is my not bonding a result of discomfort with vulnerability? Have I been hurt in my past bonding experiences? Has my trust been abused? Is my fear of bonding a result of the deficient bonding I experienced as a child? To cultivate your capacity to bond, even if you have valid reasons to distrust, you must remember that God gave you a Divine soul that is nurturing and loving and you must learn to recognize the voice within, which will allow you to experience other people's souls and hearts. Then you can slowly drop your defenses when you recognize someone or something you can truly trust. One additional point: Bonding breeds bonding. When you bond in one area of your life, it helps you bond in other areas. Exercise for the day: Begin bonding with a new person or experience you love by committing designated time each day or week to spend together constructively.

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Day 42 ― Malchut of Yesod: Nobility in Bonding




Bonding must enhance a person's sovereignty. It should nurture and strengthen your own dignity and the dignity of the one you bond with. Does my bonding inhibit the expression of my personality and qualities? Does it overwhelm the one I bond with?



Exercise for the day: Emphasize and highlight the strengths of the one with whom you bond.





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WEEK 7 ― MALCHUT ― SOVEREIGNTY, LEADERSHIP



During the seventh and final week of counting the Omer, we examine and refine the attribute of Malchut ― nobility, sovereignty and leadership. Sovereignty is a state of being rather than an activity. Nobility is a passive expression of human dignity that has nothing of its own except that which it receives from the other six emotions. True leadership is the art of selflessness; it is only a reflection of a Higher will. On the other hand, Malchut manifests and actualizes the character and majesty of the human spirit. It is the very fiber of what makes us human.



Malchut is a sense of belonging. Knowing that you matter and that you make a difference. That you have the ability to be a proficient leader in your own right. It gives you independence and confidence. A feeling of certainty and authority. When a mother lovingly cradles her child in her arms and the child's eyes meet the mother's affectionate eyes, the child receives the message: "I am wanted and needed in this world. I have a comfortable place where I will always be loved. I have nothing to fear. I feel like royalty in my heart." This is Malchut, kingship.



Day 43 ― Chesed of Malchut: Loving-kindness in Nobility



Healthy sovereignty is always kind and loving. An effective leader needs to be warm and considerate. Does my sovereignty make me more loving? Do I exercise my authority and leadership in a caring manner? Do I impose my authority on others?



Exercise for the day: Do something kind for your subordinates
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__Day 44 ― Gevurah of Malchut: Discipline in Nobility Although sovereignty is loving, it needs to be balanced with discipline. Effective leadership is built on authority and discipline. There is another factor in the discipline of sovereignty: determining the area in which you have jurisdiction and authority. Do I recognize when I am not an authority? Do I exercise authority in unwarranted situations? Am I aware of my limitations as well as my strengths? Do I respect the authority of others? Exercise for the day: Before taking an authoritative position on any given issue, pause and reflect if you have the right and the ability to exercise authority in this situation. Day 45 ― Tiferet of Malchut: Compassion in Nobility A good leader is a compassionate one. Is my compassion compromised because of my authority? Do I realize that an integral part of dignity is compassion? Tiferet ― harmony ― is critical for successful leadership. Do I manage a smooth-running operation? Am I organized? Do I give clear instructions to my subordinates? Do I have difficulty delegating power? Do we have frequent staff meetings to coordinate our goals and efforts? Exercise for the day: Review an area where you wield authority and see if you can polish it up and increase its effectiveness by curtailing excesses and consolidating forces. Day 46 ― Netzach of Malchut: Endurance in Nobility A person's dignity and a leader's success are tested by his endurance level. Will and determination reflect the power and majesty of the human spirit. How determined am I in reaching my goals? How strong is my conviction to fight for a dignified cause? How confident am I in myself? Is my lack of endurance a result of my low self-esteem? Do I mask my insecurities by finding other excuses for my low endurance level? Exercise for the day: Act on something that you believe in but have until now been tentative about. Take the leap and just do it! Day 47 ― Hod of Malchut: Humility in Nobility Sovereignty is God's gift to each individual. Hod of Malchut is the humble appreciation of this exceptional gift. Does my sovereignty and independence humble me? Am I an arrogant leader? Do I appreciate the special qualities I was blessed with? Exercise for the day: Acknowledge God for creating you with personal dignity Day 48 ― Yesod of Malchut: Bonding in Nobility Examine the bonding aspect of your sovereignty. Healthy independence should not prevent you from bonding with another person. On the contrary: self-confidence allows you to respect and trust another's sovereignty and ultimately bond with him. That bond will strengthen your own sovereignty, rather than sacrifice it. Does my sovereignty prevent me from bonding? Could that be because of deeper insecurities of which I am unaware? Do I recognize the fact that a fear of bonding reflects a lack of self-confidence in my own sovereignty? Exercise for the day: Actualize your sovereignty by intensifying your bond with a close one. Day 49 ― Malchut of Malchut: Nobility in Nobility Examine the sovereignty of your sovereignty. Does it come from deep-rooted inner confidence in myself? Or is it just a put-on to mask my insecurities? Does that cause my sovereignty to be excessive? Am I aware of my uniqueness as a person? Of my personal contribution? Exercise for the day: Take a moment and concentrate on yourself, on your true inner self, not on your performance and how you project to others; and be at peace with yourself knowing that God created a very special person which is you. After the 49 days of Counting the Omer, after having fully achieved inner renewal by merit of having assessed and developed each of our 49 attributes, we arrive at the fiftieth day. On this day we celebrate the Festival of Shavuot, the giving of the Torah (Matan Torah). After we have accomplished all we can through our own initiative, then we are worthy to receive a gift (matan) from Above which we could not have achieved with our own limited faculties. We receive the ability to reach and touch the Divine; not only to be cultivated human beings who have refined all of our personal characteristics, but divine human beings who are capable of expressing ourselves above and beyond the definitions and limitations of our beings. ______________________________
THE TORAH IS ACQUIRED 48 WAYS R NOAH WEINBERG


48 Ways
http://www.aish.com/h/o/lac/48971726.html?s=g
ABC's of the Omer
The significance, customs and mechanics of counting the Omer.

by Rabbi Shraga Simmons


Each day of the Omer is related to a different level of the kabbalistic "Sefirot," the emanations through which God interacts with the world. (see: Kabbalah 101) Each of the seven weeks is associated with one of seven Sefirot, and each day within each of the seven weeks is associated also with one of the same seven Sefirot ? thus creating 49 permutations. Each day during the Omer, we focus on a different aspect of the Sefirot, with the hopes of attaining spiritual improvement in that specific area.

Specifically, since Rabbi Akiva's students showed a lack of proper respect, during the Omer period we try to look for the best way to treat our family, friends and acquaintances, so that we may make a "tikkun" (spiritual correction) on the mistakes of the past.

The Talmud (Avot 6:5) says that "Torah is acquired through 48 ways." Thus during the weeks leading up to Shavuot, many have the custom to prepare to "receive the Torah" by studying the 48 Ways. One popular method is to learn a lesson each day of Rabbi Noah Weinberg's series, the "48 Ways"; there is both a text and audio version available online.
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LAG B'OMER AND R SHIMON BAR YOCHAI CELEBRATION OF SPIR GIFTS
Lag B'Omer

Lag B'Omer, the 33rd day of the Omer ('Lag' has a numerical value of 33), marks the date of death of one of the greatest Talmudic sages, Rabbi Shimon Bar Yochai. This is a day of great celebration, because tradition says that on his death bed Rabbi Shimon revealed the secrets of the Zohar, the primary book of Jewish mysticism (kabbalah).

For centuries, Lag B'Omer has been a day of pilgrimage to the tomb of Rabbi Shimon in the Galilee town of Meiron. In one day, an estimated 250,000 Jews visit Meiron ? dancing, praying, and celebrating the wonderful spiritual gifts that Rabbi Shimon bequeathed to us. Many people camp out for days beforehand in anticipation.

To celebrate Lag B'Omer, Jews from around Israel light bonfires, to commemorate the great mystical illuminations that Rabbi Shimon revealed. For weeks before, Israeli children scavenge wood to arrange as impressive sculptures ? often 20 and 30 feet high. Great public celebrations are held and the wood towers are burned on Lag B'Omer.
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Way #1: Be Aware of Every Moment
To achieve significant results in life, the effort must be constant. Don't waste a minute.

by Rabbi Noah Weinberg
http://www.aish.com/sp/48w/48971986.html
Imagine you're stuck in traffic, and another driver is taking dollar bills and throwing them out the window. You can't believe it. The guy is whacko. Every five minutes, another dollar flies out the window!

You probably never saw this. But you have seen someone throwing five minutes out the window.

Maybe you even did it yourself. The bus takes off and you're really enjoying the scenery: "Oh, a hill... look at that store... and there's a park!"

It's not so bad for the first few minutes. But then the cash register starts ringing up more wasted time. Ding! Ding!

To become a great human being requires applying your mind constantly, until it pervades every fiber of your being.

It all begins with a decision, a commitment. Try saying aloud: "Life is an opportunity. I want to use my mind, and be constantly moving toward my goal."

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You may notice some resistance as a little voice protests inside: "No way! All work and no play will make Jack a dull boy. C'mon, let's space out and watch TV!"

Does this mean being an obsessive workaholic? Of course not -- you still need to sleep!

Let's understand. "Constant striving" means that when you sleep in order to be more productive, then the sleep becomes part of your overall goal. It's the same with eating and exercise.

So what about relaxing?

Of course it's okay to relax. But relaxing means "changing gears." Your relaxation should be purposeful and directed. Think of something else that's not as exerting, but is still meaningful. For example, shift your focus to nature, music or art. Sometimes, even a simple change of scenery, a cold drink, or a breathe of fresh air is enough to recharge your batteries.But don't space out.

We do this, because it is painful to be constantly aware, to be constantly "on."

To break through that pain, focus instead on the pay-off. When you are constantly aware, every experience becomes a lesson in life. For example, if you are in a dentist's office, you could use that time to reach any number of crucial insights:

•I'm lucky to have teeth. A toothless life would be much less pleasurable.
•If there is such a thing as dental hygiene, there must be a concept of spiritual hygiene, too. I wonder what it is.
•Without the pain of the drill, my teeth would fall out. Perhaps some other difficulties in life also help me accomplish good things.
•The human body is so intricate. The integration of teeth, gums, tongue and saliva is an incredible feat of anatomical and physiological design. How did it all come about?
Whatever you are doing at any given moment -- watching the news, working on a business deal, talking to a friend, reading this article -- give it your full attention. Decide that you are willing to take the pain of thinking, of being aware, all day long.
"CONTINUOUS:" WITHOUT INTERRUPTION

Whenever you pursue a specific goal, it should be without interruption. It's actually better to study for one hour straight, than for two hours with interruptions. Interruptions break our train of thought and limit our ability to retain information. They take the power out of learning.

Set aside a certain time when you block everything else out, where you will not budge from the activity you're focusing on. Don't sit down and then get up to open the window. Then get up to fetch a Coke. And get up again to close the window. And get up to turn on the radio.

Make up your mind: "I am going to do 'X' for one hour straight. No bouncing up and down!" For an entire 15 minutes, don't stop. Not to change your seat, not to get a drink, not for anything that isn't life-threatening!

You can practice this while riding on the bus, or waiting at the dentist's office. Set yourself a goal of 15 minutes to focus exclusively on one subject. It may be a problem you're having at work, a personal goal, or an issue in a relationship. For example, you might say to yourself, "The next 15 minutes I am going to devote to thinking about my family, how I can help them, why I love them, my pleasure in them."

Or try devoting 15 minutes a day to be aware of every aspect of life around you -- from the blood coursing through your veins to keep every cell alive, to the ant crawling across the ground under your feet. For that 15 minutes, you are totally attuned to the miracle of being alive

Then, at the end of these 15 minutes, appreciate how the time was well spent. Time that otherwise would have been wasted...

Little by little, increase your time. First 15 minutes, then 30 minutes, then one hour, then two hours. Once you hit four hours, you're sailing.

The Vilna Gaon, the great 18th century Jewish scholar, said that the first three hours and 59 minutes is stoking the furnace. By the fourth hour, the pot is boiling.

And don't stop. Because if you take the pot off the fire -- even for a few minutes -- you have to reboil it all over again.


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"CONSISTENT:" ACCORDING TO SCHEDULE

To really get into gear, you need to find your rhythm.

The human body loves patterns. Even the most daunting tasks become fluid when set into a schedule. This means doing the activity in the same place, at the same time, and in the same way (as much as reasonably possible).

That's why Judaism has certain pre-set activities every day. When waking up, for example, we say: "Thank God I'm alive." It's a moment of conscious appreciation for getting another chance, another day. This awareness gets us up on the right side of the bed, starting our day on a high note.
When it comes to any goal, make a certain time of the day "holy." For however much or little time, make a commitment and be consistent every day. There is power in that commitment. You know you are going to change. Your life will be different.

Try it. Commit yourself 365 days a year, for the rest of your life: When you wake up in the morning, appreciate being alive.


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"CYCLICAL:" REPETITION AND REVIEW

Life is not one-dimensional. It must be studied from every side and turned upside down.

Study the same subject for a long period of time. Don't bounce around superficially from one topic to the next. Choose a topic you love and become an expert in at least one aspect of life. Become engrossed.

Whatever subject you choose, there is always more to learn. Even as you move to other areas of knowledge, be alert to pick up information pertinent to previous topics. This allows for cross-referencing, and ultimately, a deeper understanding.

Whatever you learn, make sure you don't forget. How many times has an insight struck you with astonishing clarity -- and then slipped out of your mind the next day? The insight is fleeting if you don't capture it in some way. It has to sink into your bones and permeate your mind.

This means constant review of one's learning in some form or another.

Verbal repetition is powerful. It clarifies an idea and brings it into reality. That's why we repeat the Shema twice a day, and why we review the Torah year after year. The Sages of the Talmud would repeat any new insight 40 times -- and repeat an especially vital idea 101 times.

It's kind of like "Remember the Alamo!" Of course, you may forget the Alamo, but you can remember this article in a catch-phrase like "Make Every Second Count" or "Live to the Max." Whatever moves you and gets you energized, repeat it again, again and again. Make it your refrain, your background music. When you wear out one phrase, get yourself another. Whatever works has power. * * *

"COMPREHENSIVE:" BE A STUDENT OF LIFE

Imagine someone asking you, "What do you do?" You answer, "I'm a lawyer," or "I'm an engineer," or "I'm an accountant."

Wrong! Wrong! Wrong!

Suppose you see someone going to sleep, and you say to him, "What do you do?"

He says, "I'm a sleeper."

"You're a sleeper? How do you make a living doing that? Who pays you to sleep?!"

That's my point exactly. When you add up the hours over a lifetime, you spend more time sleeping than being a lawyer.

The essential you is not the lawyer. It is the thinker, the seeker, the living, breathing human being who loves, who is continually growing, who desires greatness, who hungers to know more. Identify with this. It is who you really are.

Ask a woman with four children: "Who are you?" She answers: "A mother." But that's only one aspect of who she is (albeit an important one). She's also a friend, a community volunteer, an educator, a chef, a nurse, a child psychologist, a thinker, an information gatherer, a pursuer of truth, and more.

Unfortunately, we develop this identity problem early in life. Every child is asked: "What do you want to be when you grow up?" This question has subtle implications that can damage a developing personality. The child is thinking: "What's wrong with being 'me?' Is 'me' so terrible that I have to 'become' something different when I grow up?"

The Sages say: "Make the study of life your main occupation, and your profession secondary." The question is not "what are you doing for a living," but rather "what do you do for life?" If you see yourself as a "thinker," then thinking becomes a priority. So update your self-definition. Learn your whole reason for living and live it fully.

IS LIFE GOOD?

The bottom line is you have to decide: Is life good or not?

This comes down to a more basic question: Does life have purpose? If it doesn't, then there's no reason not to waste time, because nothing really matters anyway. But if you believe there is a purpose to life, why would you want to waste any bit of it? You'll want to understand every aspect of life, to do the most with the limited time you have.

Jewish consciousness says that the worst crime is murder.

Human beings were created for pleasure. Adam and Eve were placed in the Garden of Eden. In Hebrew, Eden means "pleasure."

When you commit yourself to what a human being was destined for -- a life of pleasure -- you will go out searching for the highest pleasures. Along the way, you'll make distinctions between pleasure and comfort, between necessary pain and needless suffering. And through the process, you'll discover the true meaning of life.

The Torah says: "Abraham was old and he came with his days." Many people can become old without their days, because they may only experience growth over a year. But Abraham and Sarah had daily growth spurts. They got as much out of living as possible.

Make the commitment to discover life's deeper pleasures. It could be the difference between a useful life and a wasted one.

10 TOOLS FOR CONSTANT AWARENESS

•Plan out what you want to accomplish. If you know what you're after, you'll pursue it with more vitality.
•Plan in the evening how you'll get up in the morning. Don't let the snooze button control your life.
•To start off on the right foot, get up 10 minutes early and say the Shema.
•Review your day. See what the obstacles were. Strategize how to avoid them in the future. Review what you learned in the past 24 hours.
•Catch yourself day dreaming at least once a day and examine: "What am I doing right now, and how could I use this moment more effectively?"
•Become a student of life. Study wherever you are. Have books, thoughts, etc. ready to keep your mind growing. (No staring out the window like a zombie.)
•Memorize pieces of wisdom. It will give you something to learn as you walk down the street or wait in line at the supermarket.
•Pick appealing catch-phrases, to inspire yourself on the spot, and to wake yourself up when you feel like drifting off.
•Frequently ponder the question: What is the purpose of life? What am I doing on this planet?
•Plan ahead now. What do you want to study? What do you need to realize your ambitions? How do you want to grow?
Everyone says that "time is money." But which is more important: five minutes or a dollar? Time is the greatest opportunity of your life. Don't waste a minute of it.

•The worst murder is premeditated.
•The worst premeditated is of family.
•Even worse is murder of self -- i.e. suicide.
•Spiritual suicide is worse than physical suicide.
•Killing time is spiritual suicide
Read rest of article
Do Omer in first article

Try to get list of the blessings to recite---do all of this in evening

Fepow

http://www.fepow-memorial.org.uk/The_FEPOW_Story.htm http://www.fepow-memorial.org.uk/bibliography.htm Bibliography The following is a list of books which we found useful in preparing this website - it is by no means comprehensive, but it's a good start. The Railway Man by Eric Lomax Published by Jonathan Cape Ltd 1996 ISBN 0 09 958231 7 For those who seek to understand the trauma of POWs maltreated by the Japanese written by one who was eventually reconciled with one of his torturers Banzai you Bastards by Jack Edwards Published by Corporate Communications, 704 East Town Building, 41 Lockhart Road, Wanchai, Hong Kong. ISBN 962-7290-03-3 A moving account by the author of the Malaya Campaign from a soldier who fought in it, his capture at Singapore and subsequent shipment to Formosa (Taiwan) where he was forced to work in the infamous Kinkaseki mine for 3½ years. Behind Bamboo by Rohan D Rivett Published by Angus & Robertson 1946 The Naked Island by Russell Braddon Published by Penguin Books, 1993 ISBN 0-14-014975-9 Spice Island Slaves by Leslie J Audus Published by Alma Publishers, Richmond Surrey, 1996 ISBN 0951 7497 2 2 The extreme hardship of those who worked on the far flung islands under Japanese occupation suffering from, disease, malnutrition and brutality. Nurses at War by Penny Starns Published by Sutton Publishing Ltd. Stroud Gloucestershire 2000 Chapter 7 ISBN 0 7509 2387 3 The Fall of Singapore by Frank Owen Published by Michael Joseph Ltd. Pan Books, 1960 A detailed account of the Malaya Campaign and the Fall of Singapore Eyewitnesses of War - Sixty Accounts of Dutch Victims subjected to Japanese terror 1942-1945 Oggetuigen van Oorlog - Zestig Verhaalen van Nederlandse Slachtoffers over Japanse Terreur 1942-1945 Published by Foundation of Japanese Honorary Debts (Stichting Japanse Ereschulden) Zoutmanstraat 23X, 2518GL, Den Haag,The Netherlands e-mail stichtingjes@jesinfo.org A wide ranging collection of reports describing how Dutch military and civilian personnel were treated by the Japanese Als Krijsgevangene naar de Molukken en Flores, van JHW Veenstra et al Published Martinus Nijhoff, ‘s Gravenhage 1982 Sandakan – a Conspiracy of Silence by Lynette Ramsay Silver Published by Sally Milner Publishing Pty Ltd., Burra Creek, NSW, Australia ISBN 1 86351 223 3 A detailed analysis of the events leading to the death of 641 British and 1787 Australian servicemen at Sandakan – Ranau in British North Borneo. Only six, all escapees, survived. Surviving the Sword - Prisoners of the Japanese in the Far East, 1942-1945 by Brian MacArthur Published by Random House, New York 2005, ISBN 1-4000-6413-9 A panoramic view of Japanese treatment of POWs - a must read In the Line of Duty – a soldier remembers by Lt Gen (retd) Harbaksh Singh Published by Lancer Publishers and Distributors, New Delhi, 2000, ISBN 81 7062 106 2 Autobiography of a senior Indian Army officer. His captivity by the Japanese in Malaya as an officer is recorded in chapters 10-20. Horror in the East by Laurence Rees Published BBC Worldwide Ltd, London , 2001 ISBN 0 563 53426 5 My Life with the Samurai by Anthony Cowling Published by Kangaroo Press ISBN 0 86417 812 3 Unsung Heroes of the Royal Air Force by Les & Pam Stubbs Published by Barny Books, Grantham 2002 ISBN 1 903172 21 7 A painstaking collection of all RAF personnel taken by the Japanese as POWs, where they were taken, where they were used, and where they died. Changi- The Lost Years TPM Lewis Priest in Prison Canon John Hayter Prisoners of the Samurai – Japanese Civilian Camps in China 1941-1945 by Norman Cliff Published by Courtyard Publishers 1998 ISBN 0 9533295 0 X Yangchow Years by Grace Harvey Published by Dreamstar Books 2003 History of the Second World War – The War against Japan Vol. V by Maj Gen S Woodburn Kirby et al. Published by HMSO 1969 Prisoners of the Japanese by Gavan Daws Published by Robson Books 1995 ISBN 0 86051 978 3 A detailed description of the POW experience, predominantly through US and Australian eyes, but Chapter IX Ever After is a must When You Go Home by Alan Lane Published by A Lane Publications 1993 ISBN 1 897666 00 4 To the Kwai - and Back War Drawings 1939-1945 by Ronald Searle Published by W Collins Sons & Co Ltd 1986 ISBN 0 00 217436 7 The Colonel of Tamarkan by Julie Summers Published by Simon and Schuster 2005 A Guest of Nippon by Eddie Hunn ISBN 1 897666 73 X The Churches of the Captivity in Malaya by Rev. J N Lewis Bryan MA Published by The London Society for Promoting Christian Knowledge 1946 and other books: Scorpion on the Ceiling: A Scottish Colonial Family in South East Asia by Roddy Martine Published by Librario Publishing Ltd 2005 ISBN 1 90444056 8

Land Below the Wind

Land Below the Wind (Reprint) Agnes Keith RM40 In Stock Buy Now Description This book was written during an era when Sabah was known as North Borneo, and when life was very much different from today’s. Reprinted many times, this classic, of Agnes Keith’s observations and reflections of the time, is a true-to-life record of society and culture then and of the captivating natural beauty of Sabah. Today, Sabah continues to be known as the “land below the wind”, a phrase used by seafarers in the past to describe all the lands south of the typhoon belt, but which Agnes effectively reserved for Sabah through her book. One of few written accounts of contemporary life in Borneo in the 1930s, this book is an invaluable record of a world gone by. Table of Contents MESSAGE by Tengku Datuk Dr Zainal Adlin viiFOREWORD by Patricia Regis ixINTRODUCTION THE NORTH BORNEO OF OLD by K.M. Wong xiAGNES KEITH IN BORNEO by John Macartney xvPart I THOSE WHO WERE NOT BORN THERE I. “LOOK UP THE FACTS!” 3 II. OUTPOST OF THE EMPIRE 17 III. WHAT DO THE WOMEN DO? 49 IV. GOVERNMENT HOUSE 59 V. VISITORS 68Part II VI. A SON IS BORN 89 VII. SULU SEA 117 VIII. A MAN OF THE RIVER GOES HOME 139 IX. SMALL-BOY 158 X. THEIR PRIVATE LIVES 175Part III WE EAT THE WIND XI. A PIONEER PREPARES 205 XII. A HUNDRED TEETH AND A HUNDRED EYES 229 XIII. A BLUE UMBRELLA 240 XIV. JUNGLE MUD 271 XV. A PIONEER RETURNS 305Part IV WINGS OF HOME XVI. WITH A SHINING STAR 329 XVII. THE HOUSE OF FRIENDS 331 XVIII. TWO PEOPLE WHOM I LIKE 345XIX. FEVER 353XX. HOME 362 XVIII. TWO PEOPLE WHOM I LIKE 345 XIX. FEVER 353 XX. HOME 362
Three Came Home (Reprint) Agnes Keith RM40 In Stock Buy Now Description This is a touching sequel to the first book, Land Below the Wind, where Keith wrote of her early impressions and experiences in Borneo. Three Came Home is as different as war is to peace. It recounts the internment of Agnes Keith and her son as prisoners-of-war during the Japanese Occupation of Borneo. It is an unforgettable journey of the human heart as the book weaves through periods of emotional despair, hatred, desperation, resignation, and finally, mere documentation of a war that changed the lives of thousands who lived through it. This story was written on pieces of paper stored in secret hiding places and assembled when Borneo was finally liberated. The end of the war did not bring the end of her relationship with Borneo. She returned and much later published White Man Returns, the concluding part of a trilogy on her life on this island. Table of Contents Foreword xi 1. TO US A SON 3 2. DARK HOURS 29 3. STRANGE NURSERY 45 4. MALARIA 70 5. HAPPY NEW YEAR 86 6. IMPRISONED SISTERS 96 7. WORKING MY WAY 117 8. GETTING RID OF PROUDERY AND ARROGANCE 142 9. SUGA BABIES AT PLAY 165 10. CHILDREN OF CAPTIVITY 180 11. THE ENEMY 193 12. ENDURANCE 211 13. LAST GASP 234 14. FALLEN ENEMY 254 15. OLD LADY 269 16. SEPTEMBER 11, 1945 278 17. ROAD HOME 289 18. THREE TOGETHER 303 http://www.fao.org/docrep/03500e/03500e0a.htm#TopOfPage Sabah (North Borneo) · Mount Kinabulu, which rises to a height of 13,450 feet (4,100 meters), is situated 30 miles inland from Jesselton, the capital of Sabah (formerly North Borneo). The montane flora of Kinabulu is of the greatest botanical interest singe in the higher reaches above the low lying dipterocarp forest typical of the Malaysian region there is an isolated area of subtropical and temperate life, separated by many hundreds of miles from its nearest relatives. Above the 9,000-foot (2,700-meter) contour there occur shrubs and herbs allied to forms in China and the Himalayan region (Photinia, Pygaeum, Rubus, Potentilla, Dahpniphyllum, for example, as well as gentians, violets and grasses). Among them grow plants allied to Australia, Tasmania and New Zealand (Ranunculus lowii, Drimys, Patersonia, Euphrasia and numerous sedges). Extending down to 4,000 feet (1,200 meters) is an ever greater mixture of Australian conifers (Agathis, Dacrydium, Phyllocladus) and myrtles (Leptospermum, Cunoniacae), with Eurasian oaks, chestnuts, laurels and tea-trees (Schima, Ternstroemia). Elsewhere on the mountain are forms which are allied to Malaya, Sumatra, Java and Mindanao. The mountain, in short, possesses an extraordinary array of extraneous elements together with its own peculiarities such as rhododendrons, pitcherplants (Nepenthes), figs and orchids. Yet there is a paucity of palms, pandans and special developments of extraneous genera. A recent outstanding achievement was the discovery on the eastern side of the mountain of a new genus (Trigonobalanus) of the oak family - a beech tree with oak leaves in tiers of three to seven nuts on acorn cups along a slender stalk. It is now known that it also occurs on Celebes and Malaya, with an ally in Thailand. This botanical "missing link" brings together the northern beeches, oaks and chestnuts as well as drawing in the southern beeches (Nothofagus) of South America, New Zealand, Australia and New Guinea. Borneo can be regarded as the hub of the world distribution of the oak family. __________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ http://www.far-eastern-heroes.org.uk/Baldwin/html/war.htm -Unnecesary suffering of women and children -the European women stick it out though they could have left on the steamer (coastal) Baynain -Kuching -maps and cartoons in this accunt from Agnes Keith -Mary Baldwin's capture-David Baldwin exhaustedby overwork and poor rations and died -War Organization of the British Red Cross & Order of St. John of Jerusalem 13 August 1943 to Mrs Donald L Morrison, Edinburgh -David Baldwin's capture, engineer of SS Baynain -Tarakan oil rich Island captured by the Japanese -Innellan -Fepow story